Extracts - Violet

     Her eyes glaze over. She can smell the strong scent of something familiar to her. Poison? No, but something chemical.

     The smell effects her strangely. It seems to mean so much to her but she cannot quite place it. God, she has not smelt it in years! Then, with her head resting against the shocking cold stone, it comes to her. Chloroform. Yes! That is it! That burning aroma of surgery and jumping nerves.

     It comes to her in choking waves making her head spin. It feels like the air is perfumed with gallons of the liquid, a dispersing fragrance. She draws herself inward. She would hate to have the smell of that on her skin. As she recoils a weight moves slightly against her stomach shifting uncomfortably onto the peak of her pelvis on the hipbones. Bending her head to look, with extreme difficulty with the heavy fumes swimming around her, she sees the crown of someone.

     She knows instantly whom it is but she did not remember him lying with his head on her stomach when she fell asleep. Her neck cracks as she leans it back again gently. She rests a hand slowly on the top of his head, almost self-consciously, fingers splaying over and into his hair. His sighs shake through her as she struggles in her haze. Tears begin to blur her vision.

     Her eyes fly around the room. It seems she is sitting on the floor of this place with her back against a wall. The ceiling of the room is low with the same stone as the walls. It is like a tomb, Violet thinks. A large trolley with a white stained cloth blocks the rest of her view. She recognises the trolley as one from a hospital or Barber Surgeon’s shop. She wonders if there are any instruments lying in the trays on top but does not wish to know what the stains are on the trolley cover.

     Leon stirs beneath Violet’s hand. She watches him for a while, thankful that he is finally getting some sleep after so many restless nights. Although her eyes are streaming she finds herself smiling away. Ironic. So many odd things have happened for so long that she can no longer even begins to understand them, like before she could. Curiously, she had been dreaming about her brother. She had not thought of him for ages and it was unnerving that she should think of him now.

     [ Johann was a freak in life and now he is freaking her out in her dreams. Yet these were more like nightmares. All of them confusing and a mixture of flashes all at once like flicking quuickly through a picture book. He had spoken but it had not been his voice. She has not heard his voice for years and never again would she hear it from his lips, but she knows that the voice in the dream was not her brother’s. It was her own. ]

     Leon starts to awaken. Violet is relieved, as she will not be alone in consciousness but still jumps from his sudden movement. He wakes up lightly but then is wide-awake.

     “Violet…” He takes her left hand with both of his. His hands are cold. Violet clutches his hands tight. Her expression is somewhat strained.

     “You slept well.” She speaks the words softly, which he finds serene playing through his ears. His light eyes seem to glow as he tilts his head to look up at her. His heart beats faster than normal whenever he is with her, thudding out against his ribs. But something is wrong. His Violet looks normal to any other but Leon can feel her mind shaking as though from deep distress.

     “Violet? Violet my love?” Her eyes are large and teeth gritted. Leon sits up and looks intently her in the face.

     “Violet?”

     “I am sorry,” She finally says voice quivering, wrapping her arms around his back. “I…I see…”

     “See what?”

     “Can you not smell it? That strong scent is in the air!”

     “What? No, Violet I can smell nothing.”

     “But it is there as clear as can be! The smell of angry medicine and amputations!” Violet is fiercely grips hold of Leon, her pupils spinning.

     “Violet? Violet stop. Listen, there is nothing here.” He pulls her close, his dark blonde hair merging into her long ebony crown. She stares out from his shoulder, one eye covered breathing in his scent. The smoky air begins to fade and smells shrink into the faintest trace. All melts before her eyes, an event gradually dissolving from memory. She scowls in frustration but Leon will not let her pull away and holds her firmly against his body, kneeling next to her.  She plants a kiss on his icy cheek and grazes her face against his, eyelashes stroking the fine hairs on his skin. Harsh breath blasts out of Violet’s throat and Leon feels the heaving of her lungs against his chest. He continues to support her steadily though until this passes, as he always has done. Little by little Violet calms down but continues to tremble all over. 

     “Pain,” she whispers in Leon’s left ear, “could be a pleasure we both know very well.”

     “I would have you hurt me because it’s all I know. Love in painful measures that keeps me alive. I will always protect you from everything else.”

     “I know. I know. My beautiful paramour, my love could only ever be true.”

     “I could never forsake you.” Leon bends forward and covers Violet’s mouth with his own. They both lean close, together desperately wanting to fall deep into each other.

     “My ghost. Fall through my skin and suspend yourself there.” Violet mouths the words on Leon’s neck.

     “Internal organs tangled and bones interlocked.” Leon whispers back. Violet squirms in his arms and pushes herself further against him. Gripping to Leon’s shoulders, she leans him back, bringing passionate kisses down on his lips one after the other like a turbulent tide. Leon meets them gasping, moving his head back and forward to take the shock, catching her electric kisses.

     Hours go by like seconds. The two barely notice. They are concealed away in their own world. Hands clutching each other’s heads, they are loving and playing.Their screams fill the room but do not escape through the walls as the stone restricts their penetrating cries and cages them in. They try to block out all else around them, their minds overflowing spilling with violent emotion and the secrets they share. They know they must cherish the moments.

     Violet now lies on the stone floor, her chest rising frantically and eyes casted far away. She is fully clothed but her garments are ruffled and unbuttoned in some places. Leon lies alongside her with his head on her shoulder, breathless and his eyes are distant too. Their hands are clasped and shaking. Violet tastes blood on her lips and licks them. It tastes wonderful and spells out a passion. Her eyes re-focus and she turns to Leon.

     “My heart, are we to be here forever?”

     “Wherever I would lie with you, but I do not think we can stay here after dawn.”

     “I am sure it is after dawn by now, I do not even remember how we came here.”

     “I remember. We came after the town clock struck eleven. I counted the chimes. We were out of our heads and running so wild. It was like a freedom. For some reason we came here. Through the large oak backdoor, down the steps and into here.  I remember kissing you so tenderly then you…you seemed so tired and you fell asleep in my arms. I lay you against the wall lightly and kissed your sleeping form. It is such a pleasure to see you still sometimes, your sweet breath coming out on my hair as you dream. You make me burn, Violet.”

     “Oh it is because you douse my rage and I boil your misery.”

     “Yes... But Violet, I think we should leave here soon.”

     “I had a dream about this place,” Violet whispers unaware of Leon’s reply, “Or a place like it.”

     “You mean like a doctor’s study?”

     “Mmm…Oh Leon, it was about my brother.”

     “Your brother?”

     “Yes…it was awful.”

     “But it is all over now, right? My dear, it is gone. He is gone and you know it.”

     “I understand, it is just the shock of remembering…Johann, he was just so…oh god…”

     “Violet.. it torments your head too much, you taught me to banish these things. Let me coddle them away from you.”

     “Please take them away.” Leon stares at her for a while then suddenly gets up to his feet.

     “We will get out of here now.” He helps Violet to get up, “Come on.” Violet stands straight but looks as if she will topple. Leon supports her weight and walks in beside her. Their hard boots seem to thump louder than natural on the cobbled floor, booming out a haunting drumbeat. This place is very old and of old design. Staring around the room, Violet can imagine an operation taking place. Patient screaming, doctor hacking away, the blood rolling off the operation table, staining the cloth and channelling down into the grate of the stone floor and flooding like rivers of red.

     They edge around the disorganised equipment and up to the steep steps leading out. Without stopping, the two climb them, the stone has eroded and is slippery from use. At the top, Violet speeds up towards the wooden door so she will not have the temptation to look back upon the imaginary doctor procedures. Out the door, their eyes are welcomed too enthusiastically by the early morning light. Violet shields her eyes with her arm although the sky is not overly bright. Leon stands close beside her.

     They walk across the dewy grass and beneath the shelter of ash trees unaware of exactly where they intend to go. Violet walks ahead, wading with strange elegance through colourful leaves and foliage. She turns her head around rapidly and swings somewhat as she moves. Her eyes are oceans in the autumn radiance. Leon wants to catch up with her but feels weak and compelled to just watch her dancing ahead him, almost transfixed. For some reason, seeing her twirling away breaks his heart. He has the feeling deep inside of something terrible and has had it for so long. Something he never wants to utter or even contemplate. So deeply buried that he seldom knows it is there. But at times he knows it is true. She will always dance away from him without even meaning to. To run and chase the Secret Hearts in her head, always wanting more. Always seeking. He knows it is her nature and he would love her no other way. Sometimes it just kills him yet, still, he runs after her.